The babysitter's club

The New York Times published an article a few weeks ago, lamenting the demise of law school grad "golden ticket" jobs with big firms. Can I just say that, while the very thought of having a job with a big firm is the motivating force behind many a law student's miserable existence, for me, it sounds utterly unappealing. As in, I'd rather take a nap in the middle of the interstate than take a job with a big firm. But I can't really dispute the fact that even in a recession, first year associates at large firms make (fill in the blank) times as much money as I'm currently making, and sometimes a six figure job does sound like it would be nice. But those six figures come with the requirement that you work 80 hour weeks, sign away your soul, and promise your firstborn to the firm. A first year associate quoted in the aforementioned Times article stated, “If you do the math, you’re making less than a babysitter — not a nanny even, but an actual babysitter in high school.” Suddenly it doesn't sound like the golden ticket holders are really all that lucky. It also got me thinking about how being a lawyer is very much like being a babysitter. Every day, I have to deal with demanding clients who are convinced that their case is the only one I should ever be working on. I recall babysitting small children who were equally convinced that providing for their personal entertainment was my sole purpose for existing on this earth. As a lawyer, I have to clean up the messes people make of their lives. As a babysitter, you have to clean up the messes kids make of...pretty much everything they touch. As a lawyer, I have to put my best face forward, even when that means feigning civility when a client is going off on a rampage about something I did or didn't do. As a babysitter, tying up a tantruming kid and throwing him in a closet is always a temptation, but you know you'd never get away with it, so you fake nice until they stop screaming. For lawyers, the hours are long and the job is often thankless; at least if you're babysitting on a Friday night, you can help yourself to the fridge and the television. And at the end of the day, when you break it down to an hourly wage, for all those hours you toil, for all that fancy education you have, for all your lofty ambitions of helping people navigate the complicated legal system, you're really just playing babysitter, with compensation to match.