Shoulda put a ring on it.

I love being married, but apparently I'm the worst ever when it comes to remembering to wear the physical evidence of my matrimonial union.  Scott never misses an opportunity to comment on my inherent ability to dash out the door, sans wedding ring.  I always assure him that we're still married, even if I don't sport my bling.  It's not that I dislike my ring; I picked it out and it is a decidedly fabulous piece, but when I'm heading out to face the day, I'm usually focused on how late I'm running, rather than how complete my ensemble is.  Yesterday, I was out taking a walk during my lunch break and listening to an audiobook on my ipod, which is how I motivate myself to tolerate the rest of the workday.  As I was walking, I crossed the road at one point, to take advantage of the sunnier side of the street.  There was a random guy walking several yards ahead of me on the side of the street from which I had just crossed, and he also decided to cross the street shortly after I did, ending up again, several yards ahead of me.  Because I tend to walk pretty fast, I came up behind him, and moved over to the side of the sidewalk, preparing to pass and continue on my way.  I hate sharing the road/sidewalk/world with slow moving people.  But that is another story entirely.  As I passed Slow-moving-random-guy, he decided that would be a good time to strike up a conversation.  I missed the first part of what he said (because I had in earphones), but generally the polite thing to do when someone talks to you is not to ignore them entirely.  So I slightly slowed my pace and popped one earphone out.  The exchange went something like this...

Slow-moving-random-guy: "Out exercising in this 70 degree weather, huh?"

Me: "Oh yes,  I have to take advantage of the sunshine before it starts raining and doesn't stop until next June."

Slow-mowing-random-guy:  "So, I notice that you're quite attractive, and I was wondering if you'd like to go out for coffee sometime?"

Me: (Looks down at left hand, preparing to point to the ring finger that contains the physical evidence of the truth I am about to impart.  Cartoonish pause as I realize my ring is probably sitting on my nightstand, rather than gracing my finger.  Mentally thinking, Oh come on!  Really?) "Um, I'm married...(waves left hand that doesn't have a ring on it)  But thanks though."

At that point, I popped my earphones back in and nonchalantly started run/walking myself out of there.  First of all, what the what????  Second of all, who does that?  I'm fairly certain I was sending all the proper "do not disturb" signals.  Earphones, check.  Dark sunglasses to avoid direct eye contact, check.  Walking pace that no one can keep up with, check.  But apparently when it comes to avoiding awkwardly unexpected encounters that are best left to a club or online dating website, diamonds are a girl's best friend.